"When you have a loved one who is addicted, you feel like nobody gets it," said Linda Cary. "You feel so helpless, and you think nobody else can understand. Your life revolves around it."
The good news, Cary noted, is that you are not alone. Cary knows firsthand what it's like to love someone who is addicted to drugs, and she also knows what it's like to find the support she needed for herself through Nar-Anon, a program focused on helping friends and family members of addicts.
Cary is starting a local Nar-Anon meeting on Mondays at 7 p.m. at the Lutheran Church Parish Life Center at Christ Evangelical Lutheran Church, 125 E. High St., Elizabethtown.
Cary grew up in this area but spent 50 years living in Texas. While there, she watched her daughter struggle with drugs from the age of 14. Her daughter eventually passed away six years ago from lung cancer, and Cary is certain the drugs contributed to the problem. Two of her grandchildren also have addictions. Still, Cary is not hopeless. She found support and help in Nar-Anon.
When she moved to Elizabethtown to be closer to family, Cary wanted to join a local meeting. "I started looking for a Nar-Anon meeting here, and I couldn't find one," she recalled.
So, she started her own. The group began meeting in late February, and it's open to anyone, Cary said. Like Al-Anon for loved ones of alcoholics, Nar-Anon follows a 12-step program. "You learn to accept the fact that you have no power to change your loved one," Cary said. The meetings focus on the "three C's" of Nar-Anon: You didn't cause it. You can't control it. You can't cure it.
What you can do is take control of your life back. When you love someone who is addicted, it can become all-consuming, Cary said. "You learn to let go with love," she said. "You do not have control over what they are going to do with their lives. It's devastating, but you have to learn to let go."
She noted that the need for Nar-Anon is more important than ever as the opioid epidemic grows. "People think of drug addicts as being a certain type of person, a low-life," she said, "but I hear so many stories about people who suffered a sports injury and were given opioids and, through no fault of their own, they became addicts."
She encourages anyone to check out a meeting. "They don't have to be alone in this struggle," she said. "We can learn from each other's experiences. We can gain strength and hope from each other."
The entrance for the Nar-Anon meeting is on the side of the building, and the meeting is located upstairs. Attendees can just show up any week or can call Cary at 713-882-6188 for more information.
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